this girl's life

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How young... is too young?

The other morning I was on my way to work... at a stop light I opened up Facebook. As the updates came... there was my 18 year old niece.... saying she was engaged. I don't know who else feels like this... but when you watch a kid grow into an adult... its hard to make that transition into thinking they truly are grown up. It was odd to see that she was in fact getting MARRIED.

I can't help but worry that she is too young... that she's see far too little of this world... and that she can't possibly know who she is yet. I know I didn't... even if I thought I did. I'm not saying that getting married at 18 doesn't work. What I am saying is... that it takes a lot of work. Marriage is work even when you're 40 let alone 18. I wonder if they truly know the gravity of what they are going into.

I know at 18 I thought I knew what the whole world was about... that I knew it all. The reality is that I am a different person now than I was then. This may not be the case for her... and for her sake... I truly hope this is true. I just really want her to be happy and have a wonderful and full life. I also hope that this works... and that twenty years from now... they are going to be going strong.

The truth is.... I do very much like her fiancee. He's a great guy... and adores my niece. I have no problem with him at all. I just worry that's all. I've always been a worrier... and I doubt that will stop anytime soon.

At any rate.. there has not been a date set. My niece is going into the Navy... and leaves for boot camp in May. She said they are going to wait till after that and some schooling she has to go through.. so at least the summer of 2011. I think that will give them time to let their very young (6ish months) relationship weather the test of time and distance. If they can make it through that... I'm fairly certain they can make it work.

Love is a strong thing...but it takes more than that to make a marriage work. I know all of you who are married totally understands that. And like I said... I just want her to be happy.... and him for that matter.... they are good people.

(And before I get attacked.... I hope that I didn't come off as saying that getting married at 18 is wrong... I just think it brings some added weight. You have to grow up together essentially. I know it's not impossible... many people have done it.)


getting married and making it work is a 50/50 thing no matter what age... but I think if you wait till you are finished with your young adult life, your chances of making it work might bump up to 60/40. Either way... 18 does seem terribly too young...



Yes ma'am that is oh so true. Right now as we're sitting... she will be 20 when they get married. Dunno if that will make much of a difference...but maybe.