this girl's life

this site contains adult content- 18 and older only please

blast from the past

So today I checked an old account of mine... which I do periodically. There was an IM from someone I used to know that was left nine days ago. It said:

"Hey, don't know if you still check this account but if you do I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I hope everything is going good for you. Chris".

I sat there kinda surprised for a moment... I had not heard from this guy in.. oh... six years. Not to mention that I have no idea what he has to be sorry for? AND has he been thinking about this said thing that he should be sorry for over that many years? Honestly, I'm at a loss.

I met Chris through friends in college. I was having troubles with my ex... around then. In the process of our friendship growing... my relationship ended but would later end up reuniting.. (which of course you know by now was a bad idea).

Essentially Chris became a rebound... even if I did like him. We spent time together and of course had sex a handful of times. Nothing really came of it.... perhaps that is what he is sorry for.. who knows.

At some point my weak ass ended up having sex with the ex again.. and hence became knocked up. And before you get any ideas.. yes.. my ex is my daughter's father. I know this with every inch of my being.

From that point Chris and I kind of went our separate ways.... BEFORE I knew I was pregnant. I thought about him off an on for a bit... but soon his memory faded into oblivion till... today. So here I sit. Wondering. I'm not sure what his motivations are after so many years have passed... it seems very odd to me. I know that I would not contact someone out of the blue like that even if I felt I should have done things differently. Chances are.... that would change nothing... or, like me, they would have no idea what was going on. (LOL).

So who knows if I'll ever find out.... I mean... I'd like to know... but I'm not going to lose sleep over it by any means. I guess life is kind of random sometimes.


well, some times you think woulda, coulda, shoulda and wonder what someone is up to nowadays. i've been known to wonder "whatever happened to so and so" and wanted to contact them just to say " is life treating you now". maybe that's what he wants or maybe....possibly a guess, if he is going through something he is trying to make amends the 12 steps and thus the "sorry" comment. You won't know unless you IM him back...that's up to you, but you could just say thanks for the IM...what's new with you? I guess my only feeling is he reached out and that's something, always nice to know someone is thinking/cares about you enough (for whatever reason) to say "hey...thinking about you" and well your married/your happy....replying with a "Happy Holidays" (it is the Xmas season after all...maybe that's it) isn't going to hurt if you are really curious to know why he IM'd now after all this time. Just a'll do what makes you feel comfortable...cause you're smart that way :-) !



I did IM him back... just said hello.. that I'm doing well but that I was surprised to hear from him... and that I had no idea what he was sorry for. Hoped hie was well... and left it at that.

So far... no reply. Oh well.